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Finally, with her New Year's motto "George is Mine in '09," the talk-show host got what she was after, with Clooney's appearance set to air Monday.
"Have people been informing you every step of the way of what we've done [to get you here]?" the ever-demure DeGeneres asks Clooney.
"Informing me is not really what I would call what my office has been doing. Ah, complaining," he replies. "They were a little concerned when that marching band came in. … The trombone player hurt someone, as always."
Apparently what did do the trick in leading Clooney to the studio door was DeGeneres's decision to follow the advice of the leading man's former ER costar Noah Wyle – who advised her to also invite former Cincinnati Reds, Johnny Bench and Joe Morgan, on the show.
Though that, possibly, wasn't the only reason.
Says Clooney: "People do come up to me all the time and say, 'What's wrong with you, man? Why don't you go on Ellen's show?' [And] I say I haven't been in town, which I haven't been in town for a long time. I haven't really …"
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